Normalizing Post-Graduation Blues
I can remember the night of my High School graduation, inexplicably upset, and wanting to avoid the 24 hour grad night that was sure to come. While many felt excitement and pride, I felt loss. In my eyes my childhood was over and it was time to adult. Or should I say “adult”. I’ve come to realize that for many, this is a natural response, especially after college graduation.
I figured myself out in college and upon graduation new which grad school I would be attending and had a summer job lined up, this was the excitement and pride that I wish I had felt my first go-round with graduating. Graduate school was some of the best years of my life, I was riding high with purpose, joy, friendship, hard-work, meeting the love of my life, and feeling excited about the work I got to do upon graduation. Graduation came and went and that first week was rough. I cried, purposeless, discouraged, worried….bored. It was after graduation where life became a lull. I could ride my bike to the store, exercise when I wanted, see friends when they were available, but I had no job lined up and needed to figure out next steps: Where did I want to work? Where did I want to live?
Many young adults come through my office at this time in their lives feeling that same fear and worry that I felt. It’s easy to be sitting on the other side of it, knowing everything will be ok, you will find that job, the balance, the purpose. When you’re in the thick of post-graduation grief you don’t have the capacity to realize that this is a beautiful time in your life to shed your skin and step further into who you want to be. We shed skins many times in our lives, and that can be painful, but it’s exciting because we are self-actualizing again.
We go through so many stages of development and it doesn’t end when college is over. A whole new life is just beginning. Grieving your childhood, your innocence, the ease of being young is normal. Step into that. Allow yourself to feel those stages of grief: Anger is normal. Sadness is normal. Feeling stuck and not knowing where to go next.
Take some time to list off how you would like to spend your days after graduation: Take a trip, relax. Perhaps you’re on the job hunt. Dedicate two hours a day to applying for jobs and know that it might take many attempts before landing that job you want. What do you want your hobbies to look like with your new found time? Are you prioritizing moving your body? Are you getting enough sleep? Too much sleep? Take note of how you’d like your life to look moving forward. Remember that this time is a blip in your story and it’s not uncommon to be feeling discouraged at this time. Seek support and remember – it gets better.